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Sado-masochism, perhaps, is the most interesting, exciting and contradictory branch of BDSM. The most heated disputes and battles unfold here.

Sado-masochism - how is this normal?

Sado-masochism
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The first question of newcomers, who are acquainted with the world of BDSM and just begin to find out what BDSM means - "Is it normal to practice sado-masochism?"

Some time ago, sado-masochism was considered a very serious deviation. However, modern sexologists believe that if both partners practice sado-maso relations by mutual consent - in this case there is no pathology. Indeed, frankly, even in traditional sex, there are certain elements of causing mild pain.

The notions of "sadism" and "masochism" in the world of psychology were introduced by Richard von Craft-Ebing, one of the pioneers of sexology. He labeled some kind of sexual deviation with these words. It contained the achievement of sexual pleasure, by obtaining or causing physical or psychological suffering. The terms got their name after the names of famous personalities who were the first to write about such deviations in their works. This is the Marquis de Sade and Leopold von Sacher-Masoch.

  • Sadism in BDSM is about getting moral as well as sexual pleasure from causing physical pain or moral humiliation to its "victim" - the Bottom partner, the masochist.
  • Masochism in BDSM is the achievement of sexual gratification and moral pleasure from obtaining physical pain, as well as moral humiliation from Top, sadistic partner.

Sado-masochism: steel bondage1.Sado-masochism: steel bondage


Sadism and masochism are a kind of symbiosis of deviations, which are mutually complementary and completely not separable, they can’t exist without each other. When it comes to sado-maso relationships, it is important to divide the topic into two areas:

  • Sado-masochism, which implies a certain sexual component, sexual intercourse or other sexual acts.
  • Sado-masochism, which completely excludes sexual contact between partners.

In the first variant, sexual interaction is not only a purpose, but a kind of foundation on which the pleasure of sex is based on.

In the second variant, sexual relations are not just undesirable, but, as a rule, completely restricted and included in the Taboo. Such moments are always discussed during the stage of acquaintance.

In both options, the actions and motives of Sadist lie on the desire to hurt the Bottom partner. However, they are not based on aggression and malice, but on desire to please the partner, to bring him emotions that other sexual partners simply can’t deliver.

Sado-masochism: sweet pain2.Sado-masochism: sweet pain

Right now, the BDSM subculture has become widespread. More and more people are becoming interested in what BDSM means. And, as a result, psychologists, lawyers and traumatologists face the consequences of sadomasochistic gaming relations, called BDSM-relationships. Similar precedents are to occur, because partners hurried to start the practice themselves without specifying important key points: taboo and restrictions. Even if we talk about an experienced couple, it is worth speaking out all the points that worry and concern both of you before starting a new practice.

Another question arises quite often – “How safe is sadomasochism?”. And there is simply no answer. Practices in BDSM involve the imposition of wounds and injuries, depending on the chosen practice. So there is a great number of factors - the force, the zone of effect, Sadist’s experience in this practice, the willingness of the masochist to get exactly this pain, the personal level of the pain threshold of the masochist, his physical health at the moment, as well as his psychological attitude. And then again it is worth repeating the main regulation - SPEAK with your partner. Discuss what worries and what bothers you. Agree on the "stop word" or signal-words that will inform the partner that you need to recover breath or to reduce the rate and intensity of the impact, if it is about flagellation.

Sado-masochism:blindfold 3.Sado-masochism:blindfold

The forbidden fruit is sweet, it attracts newbies to BDSM. Trying sado-masochism is a personal matter only. SM practices are not prohibited by law, but the consequences that may arise due to violations of the SSC may lead to serious outcomes in life. Causing pain to a masochist without his consent to that will be considered as violence. The victim can sue for rape or bodily harm.

Recent sociological studies have shown, that the couples who dare to try sadomasochism tend to have strong and established relationships. They have a high level of trust in each other. However if you search a new, unfamiliar partner in this form of BDSM relations you deal with great risk of running into an inadequate Sadist, who will be able to cause horrible, and sometimes irreparable harm to health and psyche. Therefore, before bringing oneself to such experiments, make sure you are ready for them. Talk to your partner, whether he is ready and wants to try something new as much as you do. It is worth remembering that BDSM relationship can change your relationship with a partner dramatically by changing your sexual views and preferences.

If you are still full of enthusiasm, don’t forget about SSC. This is the only key to a harmonious relationship in the topic as a whole, and in BDSM in particular - the observance of the three principles (SSC): Safe, Sane, Consensual.

Another item became relevant in this abbreviation: Confidentiality.

Following these rules is the line that separates ordinary, domestic sadism from sadomasochistic practices in BDSM.

Sado-masochism: pain and pleasure4. Sado-masochism: pain and pleasure

2018-03-29

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11 months ago

try it with me